In fact, understanding Peaceful Parenting® means understanding why there is a need for setting limits and standards for our children. Our children are born with a genetic instruction for freedom. But this does not mean there are no limits. A Peaceful Parent's job is to establish online parenting classes, allowing only as much freedom as a child has responsible behaviors to handle.
As we increase our children's freedom we must teach him/her the increased online parenting classes to handle the additional freedom. This means setting standards and setting limits.
The distinction between Peaceful Parenting® and other kinds of online parenting classes is not in the kinds of standards and limits set. The distinction is how we manage ourselves and our children when our children do not meet our standards or abide by our limits.
Conventional wisdom teaches adults to ensure that children will meet online parenting classes standards and abide by limits by externally controlling the child.
If a child does not do his homework, many parents would either punish the child by taking away some privilege or threaten online parenting classes. If a child does not follow the limits of his curfew, many parents would take away the child's privilege of going out the next time.
Many Peaceful Parents expect that their children will complete their homework. Parents who are attempting to follow Peaceful Parenting® ideas still set a curfew when their children leave the house. However, if a Peaceful Parent's child fails to complete the assigned homework or does not comply with the agreed upon curfew, Peaceful Parents do not attempt to externally control their online parenting classes. Threats, punishments and consequences are not how these parents work with their children around expectation and limits.
Giving up the urge to externally control our children into compliance is difficult. Because we are parents with online parenting classes we have pictures in our quality worlds of our children meeting our expectations. When they don't we still feel the urge to get our children to do what we want. The difference is that with Peaceful Parenting® knowledge, we understand that trying to externally control our children is not the answer.
So here are some steps to help you get started.
Step 1. Set the limit/standard.
Explain to your child why you have set the online parenting classes standard that you have. Whenever possible, ask for your child's opinion and incorporate his ideas into the standard/limit.
Step 2. Expect compliance.
Explain to your child what your agreed upon online parenting classes standard is. Ask if she understands it and is willing to follow/abide? Explain that you expect she will comply.
Step 3. Working things out together if your child doesn't meet the standard or comply with the limit.
Based on your agreed upon plan made in step 3, follow the plan of talking together. Using the "magical question" by asking your child what she wanted that she tried to get by not meeting the standard or abiding by the limit. Work together to come up with a new online parenting classes or limit that incorporate your child's desire responsibly. This may mean that you need to alter your expectation or limit slightly.
In the Peaceful Parenting® model you and your child both win because you work together to figure out how you both can get what you want.
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